Last night, David Robinson, second baseman for the St. Louis Cardinals, hit 3 home runs and brought his batting average over .400 at the All Star break in the 2015 MLB season.

Some of you might say: “But the Cardinals won the World Series last Friday!” “David Robinson was a basketball player” or “Hey moron! It’s 2011, not 2015.”  You would all be right in saying this, especially the moron part. However, thanks to the miracle of video games, the virtual David Robinson can enjoy a long career doing whatever he pleases.

It doesn’t stop there for the great virtual David Robinson. In addition to being an All-Star major leaguer, he’s also the starting quarterback for #1 Alabama (coming off two national championships in 2011 and 2012). Basketball? Leading scorer for the 2011-2012 Phoenix Suns (yeah, in virtual world, the NBA exists in 2011-12).  He’s even good in hockey, where he made a rare appearance for the Phoenix Coyotes, scoring 4 goals in a game, never to be seen again.

Sports video games have always been my favorite for this exact reason. First person shooters? Go to hell. RPG’s? Until Shaun finishes his masterpiece, they’re only good for one playthrough. With Mario selling himself out, sports games take the cake as far as value for your money.  They allow you to do realistic things that you’d never have any shot to do in real life. For example, last week I took virtual David Robinson to the playoffs on NBA 2k11, scoring 40 points per game in the first round.  After finishing that, I went to the gym to play some pickup basketball, and proceeded to only make three shots in an hour of play and get burned by my defensive assignment all game. It was a stark contrast into how good I could be, and how good I am.

While I’ll never trade the thrill of actually playing a game for a video game (even if I am terrible at said game), there’s something to be said for success in any endeavor. Sports and entertainment have always been the lone things in this world that you can totally invest yourself in with no repercussions whatsoever. I can go to the gym and shoot lights out or miss every shot I take, have a great time doing it and no one is affected by it in any way. Video games allow that same lack of emotional responsibility, but sports games give you the more personal feel.

Normal video games place you in the role of a character, and then you assume that role to lead the character through a story. Many are expertly told, and lead to a wonderful experience; however, the personal connection isn’t there like there would be with a character you created, with your own name and your same looks. The best part about the ability to create your own characters? No need to constantly buy the new version of a sporting game every year, as you can just continue with your same character year after year.

So virtual David Robinson will keep chugging along through year after year and sport after sport; at least until apathy sets in for real David Robinson. Now if only I could find a way to get paid the same amount of real dollars that virtual David Robinson gets in virtual dollars…